YAY WEIRD CROSSOVER BAR FIC THINGY!
by Alex Sambora
Summary: YAY!MY FIRST BAR FIC THINGY!THE SMASHERS GET DRUNK AT A BAR!Oh wait...OH WELL!CONTAINS PEOPLE FROM ANIMAMAGNA,CARTOONS,BOOKS,TV SHOWS,AND ALL THAT CRAP!RR!RATED T FOR CUSING IN LATER CHAPTERS!
1. Uhhhhhhhhhhh,What Now?

JS:YAY!My first SSBM bar fic!Cranky!Disclaim!

Cranky: sigh queitlyAnd I agreed to this WHY?

JS:NO STALLY!DISCLAIMY!

Ganondorf:Is 'disclaimy' even a word?

JS:AHH!BEGONE,KOGA!pulls out a can of this stuff called 'Idiot Wolf Demon Repelent...Thingy'...notices that its only GanondorfOh.Hey,Ganondorf...MY MOM AND BRO BEAT YA SORRY BUTT!

Ganondorf:watching my mom beat his sorry true formDang it...

JS:holds up a Alakazams spoon...charging up a weird attack called 'The Spoon Of Doom'Spoooooooon...

Ganondorf:Crap.

JS:Oooof...

Cranky:YOUVE DONE IT NOW,GANONDORF!

JS:DOOOOOOOOOOOM!

A large blast comes from the large spoon.

Cranky:RUUUUUUUN!

The large blast hits Ganondorf squarely in the butt.

Ganondorf:Ow.

JS:glares at Cranky who is useing the whipped topping vacum from IDs fic to cover Ganondorf in whipped topping sigh I dont own SSBM.

Cranky:after covering Ganondorf in whipped toppingONWARD CHAPPIE!

JS:ID?ID,is that you?

Cranky/ID:Dang it...

Chappie 1-NEW BARTENDER!PARTY!

JS is walking down the street when ID comes out of a bar.

ID:Hey,girl.You want a job here?

JS:shrugsSure.Why not?I only have to wait five more years until I can get a job.Why not practice?

ID:YAAAAAAAAAY!IM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!runs off

JS:shaking headPoor girl...

JS walks into the bar.The Hyrule field music was playing on some old fasion radio.Cranky is sitting on a chair watching DK and Marth fight over who loves Candy more.Roy and Link are playing pool like idiots that can only count to two.Mario pinned down a cat that was doing it with a dog(YES!A CAT WAS DOING IT WITH A DOG!).Y.Link and Kirby where plotting something.Everyone else was either passed out drunk,drunk,or in the bathroom pukeing or going to the bathroom.

Luigi:wakes up with a jolt of lightningNEW BARTENDER!PARTY!

A/N:REVEIW!


	2. Uhhhhhhhhhhh,What Happened?

JS:NOW FOR THE SECOND CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!

Cranky:Took you long enough.

JS:runs into a brick wallHooray for hurtness!

Cranky:peers downYou're the weirdest girl I've ever met that thinks I'm cute.rolls eyes

JS:drunk by boozeHow'd you know I thought you were cuuuute?

Cranky:You should really consider keeping a lock on your diary.starts to read the last page in the restricted section in JS' diaryWhoa!drops book,scared out of his witsTOO MUCH INFORMATION!TOO MUCH INFORMATION!

Ganon:What?looks at the page and drops the bookHOLY CRAP!!!!!!!!!!

JS:I LIKE BEER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chapter 2-Five Hours Later,Other Crap,And Random Parodeies!

JS:looks around bar,dozes offSooooo tired...wakes up with a snapHuh?Wha?

Coca-Cola mascot:Hiya,JS!

JS:Hiya,weird panda dude!

Coca-Cola mascot:I'm not a panda.I'm a polar bear.

JS:Oh.Hiya,weird polar bear dude!

C.C.M:Hiya!

JS:Hiya!

Cranky:drunkShut up,you morons...breaks beer bottle on Marth's headOhhhhhhh.Shaaaaaarp...

JS:wakes up with a snap of electricityFREAKY POLAR BEARS OF DOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cranky:drunkMaaaaaaaaarth,stop singing the ending song off of 'Barney'!

Marth:drunker than holy hellI love youuuuuuuuu,you love meeeeeeeeee.We're a happy familyyyyy.With a great big hug and a kiss for me and you...rolls over and throws up all over JS' feet

JS:sweatdropDon't I feel special?remembers what she was going to sayI've got a better version!This was made by my sis KattsEyeDemon.

Cranky:sits up

JS:I hate you!You hate me!Let's hang Barney from a tree!With a great big stick and a wack for me and you!Barney's dead,yip yip harooy!

Everyone else:stares

JS:What?

Cranky:stiffles laughter

Marth:laughing so friggin' hard,it turns into a full-blown sezire

Cranky:Marth,you stupid son-of-a-(beep)!

Marth:Son-of-a-(beep)?!SON-OF-A-(beep)?!YOU'RE A SON-OF-A-(beep)!

Cranky:Moronic prince!

Marth:Old coot!

JS:(breaks the two apart just as they were about to pounce on each other and tare each others eyes out)Stop,you two,or no more Smernoff!

Cranky and Marth:NO!!!!!!!!!PLEASE DON'T TAKE AWAY THE SMERNOFF!!!!!!!!!!ANYTHING BUT THAT!!!!!!!

JS:Then no more fighting!

Cranky and Marth:Alright.We'll stop.

JS:Good.Here's your reward.(throws thirty bottles of Smernoff to them.They both catch fifteen)

Cranky and Marth:YAY!!!!!!!!!THANK YOU,JS!!!!!!!!!!

JS:Welcome,boys.

FIFTEEN MINUETS LATER

Cranky:(face light green)I don't feel good.

Marth:(face light green also)Me either.

Samus:(rolls eyes)I guess that's what you get for drinking** FIFTEEN BOTTLES OF SMERNOFF WITHIN TEN MINUETS**!!!!!!!!!!!

Marth:(about to throw up)EXCUSE ME!!!!!!!!(runs past Samus to bathroom running over a few people)

Cranky:(face turning back to original color)What's his problem?

Samus:(notices Cranky's face turning back to original Color)What the-?Your face is turning back to its original color!What's with that?

Cranky:Huh?Oh.Well,Kongs are a little different.You see,Samus,Kongs don't really get sick.They just get sick for a couple of minutes then go back to being normal.

Samus:I see...(accidentaly knocks over her cup with peanut butter in it and it comes out like a river flowing)NUUUUUUUUE!!!!!!!MY PEANUT BUTTER!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cranky:(shakes head)HEY,JS!!!!!!!!!

JS:GORRAMIT!!!!!!!!!FOR THE HUNDREDTH TIME,WHAT?!

Cranky:Samus needs more peanut butter.

JS:(exploding with anger)GORRAMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!YOU TARE ME AWAY FROM MY WORK...(looks at ketchup-drunk Pikachu lying on a pool table singing the ending song off of Barney drunkly,sweatdrop)ER...WHAT I _THINK_ IS MY WORK JUST BECAUSE SAMUS RAN OUT OF GORRAM PEANUT BUTTER?!

Cranky:...Yes.

JS:THAT'S IT!!!!!!!!!!!!(stands up on bar counter)EVERYBODY OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone except Cranky,Samus,and JS:Aw...

JS:I SAID OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RoyalFanatic:Now,now,JS.Deep breaths.

JS:Deep breaths?DEEP BREATHS?!HOW THE HELL DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO THAT?!I'M CUSSING AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS JUST BECAUSE SAMUS RAN OUT HER GORRAM PEANUT BUTTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone except Cranky,JS,RF,and Samus:ALL THIS BECAUSE SHE RAN OUT OF PEANUT BUTTER?!

Pikachu:(seeming to get drunker by ketchup every minuet)I love youuu,you love meeee.We're a happy familyyy...(rolls over and throws up on pool table)

JS:Great!!!Now I have to pay for that too!!!!!

Cranky:Um...yeah.Good for you.

DK:She has anger issues.

Cranky:She's just had a long night.I mean,it's only...(checks watch that magicly appeared.How it appeared is in your own imagination)...ONE A.M?!DK...I think we should leave.

DK:Why?

Cranky:Um...We have that...meeting in the morining.

DK:Crap.I forgot.Oh,well.Bye,JS.

JS:(strangling a drunk-by-ketchup Pikachu)Bye,DK!Bye,Cranky!

DK and Cranky leave.

JS:(stops strangling Pikachu)OK.Now that that's over...It's time for "The Weird Parodey Of Kidd Kraddick In The Morning!!!"

Cast for The Weird Parodey Of Kidd Kraddick In The Morning

Kidd Kraddick-JS

Big Al Mac-Luigi

Kelly Raspberry-Samus

Show one: Lots Of Random Crap

I'll just call 'em by who they are playing as

Kidd:So,Al...How are you?

Al:Good.You,Kelly?

Kelly:Oh,why do _I_ have to be stuck as Kelly Raspberry?!I wanna be Kidd!

Other two:...?

Kelly:I'm a _girl_ and so's _JS_,yet _she_ gets to be Kidd!

Kidd:That's 'cause I'm weird and you aren't!

Kelly:Kidd is-!...Ooooh.I get it now.

Al:Awww...I lost the bet!

Kidd:Haha!You lost!Now,gimme my Yoshi's Island DS stratigey guide and DK 64 stratigey guide!

Al:(forks over the goods)

Kidd:Thank you.(looks on the front of the Yoshi's Island DS stratigey guide,fan girl scream)KAAAAAWAAAAIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DK looks_ sooo_ KAWAII!!!!!!!!!!!!

DKJr. comes in.

DKJr.:Someone say something about me?

Kidd:(hides guides,nervously,shifting eyes)N-no!!Who said we were talking about you?!

DKJr.:That's odd.I coulda sworne I heard somebody say my name.

Kidd:(sweatdrop)Nope!Didn't!

DKJr.:(notices guides)Hey.What're these?(picks up the two guides,looks on the Yoshi's Island DS guide)O.O WHAT THE HELL?!?!

Kidd:DKJr.,no cussing.Otherwise I'll _tell Wrinkly and Cranky_!!!!!!(laughs maniaclly)

DKJr.:YOU WOULDN'T DARE!!!!!!!!

Wrinkly comes through the wall.

Wrinkly:This isn't Anariki Makaru airwing house is it?

Kidd,Al,and Kelly:No.

Wrinkly:Kidd?Did you laugh maniaclly earlier and say something about telling me and Cranky about something?

Kidd:(turns to DKJr.,evil grin)

5 minuets later

Wrinkly:HE WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!

Kidd:You heard me.He _cussed_.

Wrinkly:(mumbling to self)As soon as I find DKJr.,I will kick his ass!!!!(floats out of room)

Kidd,Al,and Kelly:?!

Kelly:How can a ghost kick someone who is still alive's ass?!

Kidd:I dunno.

Al and Kelly:YOU'RE THE AUTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kidd:So?I'm not the MAIN CAUSER OF MASS DESTRUCTION in this story!

End show one

Daisy:That was unnessesary.

JS:Who cares?It was funny!But,yeah,it's true.I'm not the MAIN CAUSER OF MASS DESTRUCION in this story.

Mario:How come 'Main Causer Of Mass Destruction' is all in capitials?

JS:Because I'm the auther and can do whatever I want!I can even drink smernoff,beer,whisky,wine,daiquris,or vodka at my age if I wanted to!(grabs a bottle of a type of alcohol above)

Midna and Wolf-Link from The Legend Of Zelda:Twilight Princess came in.

Midna:I'd like a grape daiuri and a...What would you like Wolf-Link?

Wolf-Link:Bark,bark!(Trans:Water,please!)

Midna:Yeah.A grape daiuri and a bowl of water please!

(A/N:I'm not entierly sure if there are grape daiquris.So let's just pretend there are.)

JS:Sure,Midna.(puts bowl of water and a grape daiquri on the counter)Oh.And,Midna,each time you and Wolf-Link come here Wolf-Link can drink at the counter with you.

Hearing this,Wolf-Link climbed up onto a bar stool and happily drank his water.

JS:HEY,EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!SINCE THIS IS MY FIRST WEEK AS A BARTENDER,ALL DRINKS ARE FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone else:WOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

36 FREAKING HOURS LATER

Yuske Urimeshi walked in.

JS:Hi,Yuske!

Yuske:Hi,JS!

Sakura Hanuro,Sauske Uchiha,Kakashi Hitake,and Naruto Uzameki walk in.

DK Jr.:Um...How many anime and other people are going to be in here?

JS:Does that conceren you?

DK Jr.:P I dunno.

JS:...

Syroan Li walks in.

Syroan:Hi,guys!

DKJr. and JS:Hi,Syroan!

JS:Wait a sec.(to Syroan and DKJr.)You two know each other?

Syroan:)Afraid so.

JS:3(sweatdrop)...Man,I've gotta get a life.(notices something)Hey wait.DKJr.,I thought you were being hunt down by Wrinkly!

DKJr.:Huh?Oh,yeah.(hears crashes and voices in background)Well,that's my cue!Bye,Syroan,bye,JS!(runs like hell out of bar)

Voice#1:GET YOUR SCWERNY ASS BACK HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Voice#2:NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Syroan and JS:3(sweatdrop,anime fall)

Kakashi:(reads Icha Icha Paridise book)

Sakura,Sauske,and Naruto:...

Kakashi:(puts book back in pocket)

Naruto and Kakashi:(randomly)SAUSKE BUSTERS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sauske:AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(starts running around with Kakashi and Naruto behind him going,"SAUSKE BUSTERS!!!!!!!")

JS,Sakura,and Syroan:...

Yoshi,Mario,Luigi,and Dr.Mario:Hehehehehehe...

A/N:Well,whadja think?R+R plz!


End file.
